The transcript for Doom and Gloom.
It was a rainy Monday. Lisa was conducting a science experiment.
An e-mail popped up from Lucy, which said:
"Lisa, something you should know... Our old family dog passed away yesterday. Mom and Dad discovered that this morning when he wouldn't wake up for his usual kibble. Sigh. The other siblings know, too. Silas, Haiku, Rocky, and I are planning a funeral. Bring Hugh and your kids. They should pay Charles their respect."
Lisa turned off her computer and began to cry.
Hugh: What's wrong?
Lisa: Charles died.
Hugh: You mean that cute little bulldog who always liked to snuggle on my lap when I tutored Lincoln?
Lisa: YES! Lucy's planning a funeral. We can say goodbye.
Hugh: Okay. I'd like to say goodbye, too.
Lisa: I am also pulling Hugh Jr and Alicia out of school. They should say goodbye to Charles, too.
Hugh Jr and Alicia overheard and entered.
Hugh Jr: Really?
Alicia: This is so sudden... And who's Charles?
Lisa: Charles is my family's old pet dog. Unfortunately, he died, so Lucy invited us to a funeral.
Alicia: Aw man. That stinks.
Hugh Jr: And to think. We never even met the little pup!
Lisa: Well... I guess you can meet him now... The funeral's in an hour.
An hour passed, and the entire Loud family were crowded all around a little black dog coffin.
Lisa, Hugh, Hugh Jr, and Alicia entered.
Lucy came up to them.
Lucy: Glad you guys made it. Sigh. The family's just paying their respects.
Silas, Haiku, and Rocky entered.
Lucy: Oh, and also my friends came to pay their respects, too.
Rocky: Yep. Even though Lucy and I split, I should still attend this funeral.
Haiku: Yep. And even if I never knew Charles before, I still came to support my girl.
Silas: Of course, Lucy needed help with the dog's body. He'll have to be cremated.
Lisa: Have you decided where to bury him? I assume you would.
Lucy: Of course, we will. Silas and I planned to bury him in the old Loud's house backyard.
Lisa: Hmmm. Interesting.
Moments later, the funeral service started.
Lucy came up onto the platform.
Lucy: We came to honor a dear friend. A white bulldog. Our pet, Charles. Anyone who wants to say a few words can.
Luan went on the platform.
Luan: Charles was a great dog. Even though he never laughed at my jokes, I could tell them confidently with him around.
Luan left the platform.
Leni got on the platform.
Leni: Though Charles could never speak, he gave me great fashion advice. I'll really miss you, Charles!
Leni left the platform.
Lana got on the platform.
Lana: Charles was an amazing dog! I remember the day we first got him... It was a sunny summer day. Dad was -
Lucy went back on the platform and interrupted Lana.
Lucy: Lana, I think we all know this story... Sigh... Let someone else speak.
Lana: Okay, okay. But Charles was an amazing dog. That's all I'll say for now.
Lana left the platform.
Lori got on the platform.
Lori: Charles was literally the sweetest dog. I'm sad he's gone.
Lori left the platform.
Lola got on the platform.
Lola: Charles will be missed greatly. He was the cutest thing!
Lola left the platform.
Lily got on the platform.
Lily: Even though I couldn't love him like you did when I was a baby, he still is in my heart.
Lily left the platform.
Lynn got on the platform.
Lynn: That dog ruled!! I'll miss his ferocious barks when I won my games!
Lynn left the platform.
Lincoln went on the platform.
Lincoln: I'll always miss those walks to Clyde's house with Charles. Not to mention the frisbee games at the park... And, well. We'll all miss you!
Lincoln left the platform.
Luna went on the platform.
Luna: That Charles was the rockin'-est dog ever! I could tell he loved all my jams!
Luna left the platform.
Rita and Lynn Sr went on the platform.
Rita: That dog was so special to us.
Lynn Sr: Yeah! He never complained about my cooking!
Rita: And the trips to the vet were always pleasant since he never squirmed over the shots.
Lynn Sr: We will miss you!
Lynn Sr and Rita left the platform.
Lucy: I've always loved him. He was the best spooky companion for my seances.
Lucy stepped aside.
Lisa went on the platform.
Lisa: Though you may know me to be, well, some what cold-hearted, as Lola's ALWAYS said... I'll miss Charles.
Lisa: And normally, I don't care for inane human emotions... But...
Lisa burst into tears and left the podium.
Lucy: Okay. Now let's pay our respects to Charles on our way out.
Silas and Haiku carried in the dog coffin.
Everyone paid their respects to Charles.
Lisa opened up the coffin.
Lisa: Rest in peace, buddy.